The hubz and I are basically polar opposites. I’m eardrum-shattering loud; he’s mumble-at-best quiet. I love social situations; he’d rather be a hermit. I like to be cold; he’s begging for more blankets. He works like lightning and I’m the pokey little puppy.
You get the picture.
Year’s ago when we were first dating, our differences were mysterious. For someone who grew up with an equally loud, outgoing family, dating a shy, quiet guy was intriguing. I was a heart on my sleeve kind of gal, and he played everything close to the vest.
Every day was a new discovery.
Now that we’ve been together for 15 years, our differences are our greatest asset as a couple. Sure, it may annoy him when I get up to clean during commercial breaks, just as it makes me slightly crazy when he sets a bowl down beside the couch and then walks into the kitchen five minutes later…and leaves it behind.
But, where our opposite natures come in handy is with life in general. When one of us is at the brink, the other is there to be the rock or rein the crazy back in. If I get dramatic, he stays calm. If he gets overwhelmed, I help him devise a plan.
This natural support system that we’ve built on being different has carried over into our parenting. We don’t always see eye to eye on every issue, but that’s sometimes exactly what we need. Instead of being frustrated that we see things differently, we use it to understand the situation better. We can sit down as a couple and look at things from each others’ perspectives and figure out where to go from there…together.
People have always gotten a chuckle at just how different the Brocker and I are at our very cores, but the truth is, I can’t imagine life with anyone else…especially someone as wacky and boisterous as I am. We keep each other grounded, and in 15 years, not a single boring day has passed us by.
It’s often been said that opposites attract, and that’s most definitely the case for us. For some, being so completely different can only work for so long, but in our marriage, it’s been the glue that bound us together through some really rocky times.
Are you married to your opposite? Or is it the things you have in common that really keep your marriage strong? Chat it up in the comments. I’m dying to know what works for you.