Guest Post: Pumpkin and The F-Bomb

There are millions of people using Twitter, but every once in a great while you across someone you just click with. My friend, Pam, from I forgot what I was doing, is one of those people. Chances are, if we’re chatting, someone’s in danger of tinkling in their trousers. Love, love, love her.

So, today she and I are doing a little switchamadoodle and I’m partying at her place while she’s rocking in mine. When you’re done reading about her little one trying out her cursing chops, hop over to Pam’s place and hear about the Brocker’s packing skills when my son was born.

Take it away, Pam…

My child dropped the F bomb as a toddler.

It’s not entirely evident from my blog, but I’m happy using curse words. In fact, I drop the F bomb quite a lot in my personal life. I know it’s not nice and nice girls don’t curse, and whatever, but I do. Been doing it for some time. In fact, that’s how I met the beautiful CecilyK cuz I dropped an F’er while we were sitting together at Bloggy Boot Camp Philly and now she loves me! Ok well maybe not loves me, but she took a pic with me!

cecilyk and pam

Anyway, where was I? So, when I was much younger I had two beautiful children. Number 1 son was first. That’s why he’s called number one, see? I’m clever. So…#1 was playing with his cars and they were talking to each other and he said something like “what in the hell…” Natch, I started laughing and asked him what he said, which he then repeated. I don’t remember what I said in response, but I’m hoping I said something like “don’t use those words” cuz that’s what they teach you in Mother School to say. More than likely I laughed at his cuteness, which I’m sure is a no no.

Then many years later I had Pumpkin. When she was a toddler I was driving her, #1 son and another child (henceforth to be known as A cuz I can’t think of anything else to call her) in the car. The children were having a good time singing when Pumpkin dropped the F bomb. And I mean the MotherF bomb. It was funny cuz the car got instantly quiet like on TV when someone makes that screeeeech sound, ya know? Yeah, that one. The kids got quiet and said “ooooooooooooooooh”, you know, like the “ooooooooooh you gonna get it now” thing that kids say.

Being the proper mother of a child toddler attending a prominent Christian preschool in Texas I looked at her in the rear view mirror and said, “What did you say?” to which she said “I said mother f…” To which, I, having learnt already from #1 what to say and what not to say, said “We don’t use words like that” all the while trying very hard to compress a snigger.

Later on I’m recounting the extremely funny experience to My Mum who doesn’t understand where Pumpkin would hear a word like that to which I reply, “Duh….i dunno…” Cuz clearly I didn’t realize that Pumpkin heard me drop the MFer and knew exactly where and when to repeart it for maximum effect. It’s not like I told her how to use it. She figured that shyt out on her owns.

And you thought you were a bad mother.

bad mommy

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Comments

  1. I’ve been guilty of saying a few swear words in front of my kids. So far they haven’t started to copy me…yet anyways!

  2. Bad words come out of my mouth… more than I should admit. MF’er is something uttered under my breath far too often.

  3. I’m guilty of this too.. the more I try not to the more I do it seems..

    • I think it’s just one of those things. It’s like when you’re pregnant and you know there is stuff you just shouldn’t have, so your brain makes you want it even more. It’s totally the brain’s fault. Evil brains. ~Jessi

  4. Aren’t kids awesome? Not only do they repeat what we say, but they tell everyone that will listen the most embarrassing stories about what goes on in our homes. Have a kid and forget about secrets.

  5. I’m with Kelli on this one. For no reason, at any time is cursing necessary or appropriate. We should always speak to others with love and respect.

    • I’ve gotten much better at controlling my language, but I’m nowhere near swear-free. It’s a work in progress, because I certainly don’t want my kids to share my bad habit. ~Jessi

  6. That is the hard part with having kiddos they are sponges. They hear what you say and repeat. I am guilty of saying words. (oops) but we try to keep our kids from hearing them and saying them. Thank you for sharing

    • Kids have superhearing, too. They can hear exactly what they’re not supposed to from three rooms away, but you don’t know it until they repeat it to a your grandma or a stranger in the grocery store. Kids. ~Jessi

  7. I know it isn’t good to swear in front of your children but I will admit that I have used a few words in front of my kids that I probably shouldn’t have. Although I don’t use the F word.

    • Most of us have our slip ups. I know I’m guilty. Especially when I slip on a toy and skid into a not so comfortable split position. Yow! ~Jessi

  8. avatar Cousin Sisa says:

    Pam,

    Love it! But what would Nona think? Oh well, who gives a sh… um, never mind…

    xoxo

  9. Before kids I was the one with the not so nice vocabulary and hubby was the “nice” one. We had kids and I stopped knowing that I would probably say something in front of them and have the uh oh mommy has to put $ in the swear jar moment (Desperate Housewives!) and now hubby is the one with the potty mouth. He hasnt said anything around the boys yet but I know its coming.

  10. Ah, the things kids say and the bad mommy guilt!

  11. My daughter used the F word when she was 2. In the correct context. At my husband when she was mad at him. Whoops. :)

  12. Maybe I should keep my opinions to myself on this one. :-) I think we should give our kids a large enough vocabulary that they can come up with some awesome things to say without having to resort to curse words. I think they are disgusting and make people look trashy and uneducated. My kids are being raised to respect others by not using offensive language. Told ya’ I should have kept my thoughts to myself. LOL! On the other hand, I have tons of very close friends that would make a sailor blush and I could care less about what they say in front of my kids but they don’t use it in front of my kids. :-)

    • LOL! That should be “I could care less what they say in front of me, but they don’t use those words in front of my kids.” Sorry, was side-tracked by a fussy boy half-way through that sentence. :-)

    • Kelli i agree with what you’re saying. i’m not condoning that kind of talk at all. i think using that language sets a bad example cuz clearly they are looking at us for guidance. if i had to do it over again i would surely watch my mouth a lot more. hindsight, though.

    • I’m guilty of cursing, but it’s gotten considerably better since my littles came into the picture. ~Jessi

  13. My mom tends to curse like a sailor. Haha! However, I didn’t drop the f-word until 7th grade and it was actually an accident. Since I one day hope to be a teacher, I don’t cuss as much as I used to when I was in high school. I usually only let a word slip when I get mad or hurt now.

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